Boyfriend and I watched a movie tonight and the movie had Michael Cera in it.  During the movie, Boyfriend said "You totally have a crush on Michael Cera..." and I was like "Yeah."
Two hours later:
Boyfriend:  "On a scale of one to ten, how much do you love me?"
Me:  "Eleven million."
Boyfriend:  "On a scale of one to ten, how much do you love Michael Cera?"
Me:  "Nine."
Boyfriend:  "That's not a big gap."
Me:  "Yeah.  Especially not when you factor in how long I've known you versus how long I've known Michael Cera.  Are you jealous?"
Boyfriend:  "No."
Me:  "What if I was like 'I want to bone Michael Cera'?" 
Boyfriend:  "I wouldn't take you very seriously because you can't even say it with a straight face."
And then I looked Boyfriend straight in the face and without even a whisper of a smile I said "I want to bone Michael Cera." And then Boyfriend asked me if I was thinking about dead kittens because I usually think about dead kittens when I'm trying to keep a straight face, and I was all "Yeah"and Boyfriend was like "So you just said 'I want to bone Michael Cera' while you were thinking about dead kittens?" 
And yes.  Yes I did. 
Anyway, I have found that matters of the heart are best solved with statistics.  If I truly hope to figure out whether I like Boyfriend or Michael Cera better, I'm going to have to crunch some numbers. 
Figures and Charts:




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